Sibling Rivalry (or, Bonding?)

 In WhatsApp I received this time a black and white photograph of a duo. It was of two brothers in whose sibling rivalry the international community benefited by two famous brands of shoes – Adidas and Puma.

With fake news equally on the rise, I rang up my brother in law who was a top executive in Adidas. “Yes Athimbar (Jija ji), this sibling rivalry is the folklore in the industry,” he confirmed.

 

Take Ambani brothers in India. Probably it was not in the best of relationship that the brothers parted ways. The younger even shifted his base to Delhi for some time, possibly in protest against the allocation of assets or sectors. Luckily, both brothers were brought up in a Matru Devo Bhava spirit, and hence her final word settled the issue.

 

The entertainment industry has thrived no less on the sibling rivalry theme. Deewar, starring Amitabh Bachchan and Shashi Kapoor, was a box office hit, not to speak of its all-time great dialogue, “Mere Paas Ma hai.” Karan Arjun helped Shah Rukh Khan scale greater heights. Bharatam is one of the top 20 Malayalam movies. Apoorva Sagodarargal, a 1949 Tamil movie, was such an instant hit that Gemini remade it in Hindi. Godfather II walked away with six awards at Oscar. Lion King, Walt Disney’s animation film, minted millions.

 

From reel life to real life, there is hardly a village or household which cannot share a sibling-rivalry story. In my neighbouring village they were two brothers. The elder made a lot of money under the table. And the younger? Just his monthly pay packet. Later, the elder smelt a possible enquiry against him. He immediately registered in his younger brother’s name a house that he had bought with ill-gotten money, on the understanding that the younger would return it when things settled down. No enquiry took place. He asked for his house back. “Which house?’ quipped the younger. “This is mine only.”

 

In another, it was a property dispute. The elder showed the younger a cheque for Rs 5000 (then a big sum) and told him that it would his if he signed the ancestral property transfer documents. The younger signed. The elder tore the cheque leaf, and showed the younger a 500-rupee note and said:  ‘take it or leave it’.

 

In my house, my immediate brother was elder to me by just 18 or so months. Our childhood was thus one of blow hot blow cold. We would fight practically for every item - pencil, eraser, notebook, the solitary tennis ball, or snatching a seat closest to the lantern for dinner...

 

As we grew, it became a show of one-upmanship. We bought from the wholesale market a dozen undergarments so that we could have six each - we were of the same build. He suggested that in each garment we write with marker our initials in a corner to avoid mix up. I wrote S on all my pieces, and asked him to write R in all of his. “No need. Anything without a sign is mine,” he said, and got away with a clean set of clothes.

 

Isn’t there a brighter side to all these? Yes. Why not? In the case of Ambanis, when the younger could not pay hundreds or thousands of crores that he owed to companies and faced possible imprisonment, the senior bailed him out.

 

In the ill-gotten wealth case after both seniors passed away the son of the younger brother offered to the senior’s son to return the house. The other gracefully said, “No need, both our families are happy the way we are. Let bygones be bygones.”

 

In the cheque-tearing case, he succumbed to cancer two years later, not before seeking forgiveness from his younger brother’s son when he visited him at the hospital.

 

In my case, both he and I had registered with a house building society for a plot of land. Years later the Secretary told my brother that he could allot a plot to just one of us, not both.  “Allot it to my brother,” said my brother.

 

Yes, sibling rivalry and bonding go hand in hand.